--- created: 2022-12-08T17:19:33-05:00 updated: 2022-12-08T17:19:33-05:00 --- --- topic: [[People Growing]] people: #people/carolyncoughlin created: 2023-02-16 --- "identity with a small _i_ - how I see myself" This reminds me of [[Feedback]], and how we can be triggered by threats to our identity. It also reminds me that [[Ego Is The Enemy]]. Identity is the largely subconscious projection of ourselves: a sense of who I am. An emerging idea that has come from recent podcasts including Rob Orman and Pranay Parikh on [Stimulus. 109](https://roborman.com/stimulus/109-is-your-identity-holding-you-back/) and [Cal Newport/Brad Stuhlberg on Deep Questions](https://www.thedeeplife.com/podcasts/episodes/ep-264-in-depth-how-to-master-change-with-brad-stulberg/) is the idea of [[diversity of identity]]. It is important because separating ourselves from others is an important step in the identity formation. Teens need to reject their parents to have their [[Forming Identity]] moment, for example. It is related to [[Thinking as a group vs thinking as an individual]], because when we separate ourselves from others, we are creating a sense of self that is different than our sense in a group. If we consider ourselves also as a result of the [[social-cognitive learning theory]] to be a part of groups, we also have to consider that our identity must be the result of our social ties. So we need to be able to hold in tension the idea that we both have our own identity and our identity is inexorably connected to the people we are in social relationships with, like our family. Language is one of the may ways we project ourselves, how we dress, who we hang out with, what music we listen to, who we vote for, what car we drive, are all ways we project ourselves. Language, however, is in a recursive [[Systems]] with our identity. When we say "I would never do xxxx," we are telling ourselves a story. When helping people craft a more useful identity, it can be helpful to listen for those types of phrases, so they can be highlighted, questioned, and possibly improved. Simulation learning can impact identity formation: ![[CleanShot 2024-05-20 at 07.04.36.jpg]] (Kainth & Reedy, 2024) ##### What would the opposite argument be? We may think of ourselves as separate, but in [[The Extended Mind]] we consider how we are an interconnected mind, with our environment, our social systems, and our body, not just our mind. The whole concept of identity as a separation is flawed, unless maybe in the cases of hermits, who specifically set the world up to be separate. tags: #note/idea | #on/self | #on/growth | #on/relationships ##### Sources: https://fs.blog/knowledge-project-podcast/carolyn-coughlin/ [[Ego Is The Enemy]] [[The Mountain Is You]] [[The Extended Mind]] Kainth, R., & Reedy, G. (2024). Transforming Professional Identity in Simulation Debriefing: A Systematic Metaethnographic Synthesis of the Simulation Literature. _Simulation in Healthcare: The Journal of the Society for Simulation in Healthcare_, _19_(2), 90–104. [https://doi.org/10.1097/SIH.0000000000000734](https://doi.org/10.1097/SIH.0000000000000734)